Are You Emotionally Available?

Are you emotionally available? Is your partner emotionally available? And what the heck is emotional availability anyway and why does it matter so much?

Emotional availability really is key to maintaining and building a healthy long-term relationship!

people who are emotionally available are:

Willing to be vulnerable with their partner and willing to open up

Willing to show consistent love and affection

Are showing genuine concern for their partner's feelings wants needs and expectations

Are there for their partner during a time of stress and crisis

LEAN INTO their partner during these difficult times they DON'T LEAN OUT they look to their partner as a source of stress relief, the comfort is found in the closeness, in the love, and in that Bond

and most importantly:

Emotionally available people have the ability and desire to EMPATHIZE with their partner, even in a disagreement! They don't lose sight of the fact that they do love their partner and they do care about their partner's wants, they make an effort to make sure that their partner feels cared for to make sure that their partner's feelings are nurtured and that they feel like they matter in the relationship.

On the other hand, Emotionally Unavailable people show up to a relationship with more of a what's in it for me attitude what do I get from this how does this person make me feel good.

They generally do not have the ability or willingness to empathize with the other person especially when there's a disagreement or conflict.

When triggered they become focused on themselves and what they perceive that they want, need, feel, or fear.

They can't really see and understand their partner's emotions it really is all about them during any kind of stress.

They can't really do the deep love and bond due to their walls and their discomfort with true emotional intimacy.

They don't like being vulnerable and being too vulnerable makes them feel like they need to take space even at the expense of their partner because again ultimately the emotionally unavailable person has the what's in it for me attitude how you make me feel even after a breakup the emotionally unavailable person is the one to breadcrumb because "I want that validation I want you to make me feel okay" " I don't want to feel like the bad guys so me me me".

Typically they have a low self-esteem or a deep feeling that they're defective and worthless. This usually stems from childhood emotional neglect and they put up these walls as a way to shield themselves from being exposed because they haven't healed these wounds.

What can you do as an emotionally available person?

Hold your boundaries which are your limits of what you want and need, don't want what you'll tolerate not tolerate what you expect and don't expect those will shield you because if a person runs away because you had boundaries well they're showing you that they were never invested in you!

Hold your boundaries and it will free you up you won't be tied up with the wrong people! Don't sell yourself short!

Have you experienced a relationship with an emotionally unavailable person? How was it for you?